Posts Tagged ‘ domestic violence ’

What women do not want..

Blogadda is running a contest on “What women want?”..I am not really sure of what women want.To each its own..But when I read the below piece of news,I am pretty much sure of ‘What women do not want?”
Female condom with ‘teeth’
by Kate Townshend
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Here’s a really interesting story from CNN about the release of a new ‘spiked female condom’ designed to protect women against rape and punish the would be perpetrators. South African doctor Sonnet Ehlers is distributing 30,000 of the new devices around South African cities where world cup matches are taking place, under supervision as part of a trial period.
The condom is inserted like a tampon, and should  penetration  take place, rows of tiny, jagged teeth like hooks attach onto the man’s penis. Although these do not break the skin, it then becomes impossible for him to remove without medical help, and any attempts to do so only make the device grip on more tightly.
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Unsurprisingly the device is causing massive amounts of controversy. Critics argue that since women have to wear it any time they think they may be in danger, it exaggerates the likelihood of rape and keeps women in a state of constant fear. Equally, there are potential risks in terms of what else a thwarted and angry rapist may try to do.
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I think its easy for us in the West to dismiss such a device as medieval and barbaric, but South Africa has one of the highest rape rates in the world, coupled with one of the lowest conviction rates. This article suggests that women are already taking extreme measures to put off would be assailants, including inserting razor blades into their private parts. Whether this is the answer or not (and I’m dubious personally) clearly something needs to be done to protect women in the country.
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What was that? 😳 😕
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Before we jump into conclusions,read below..
By 2006 the official figure for rape was over 55 000 ,
unofficially, based on the premise put forward by the National Institute of Crime Rehabilitation that only one in twenty rapes are reported, the figure is over 494,000 a year. This means that on average approximately one thousand three hundred women can be expected to be raped a day in South Africa. A study by Interpol, the international police agency, has revealed that South Africa leads the world in rapes. A woman was raped in South Africa every 17 seconds. This did not include the number of child rape victims. It was estimated that one in every two women would be raped. Between 28 and 30 percent of adolescents reported that their first sexual encounter was forced. Of South African men who knew somebody who had been raped, 16 percent believed that the rape survivor had enjoyed the experience and had asked for it. According to a recent study police estimated that only one in 36 rape cases was reported and of those only 15percent culminated in a conviction.[……….]
But…Is that how we deal with assulats against women? Are all women in this planet expected to wear this,in fear of being raped at any point of time? Many or most of us would love to live in denial that “Hey,this can’t happen to me”. But are we to spent our life in constant fear and ‘ready to attack mode’ 24/7? I don’t know..This news sickens me..Agreed that manyof the victims probably would wish they had had a device like this at the time of their rape, and any man who has been through this, even if not convicted of rape, would think twice before raping another victim .But still..doesn’t it take away the responsibility from men,to women?And it seems to me that it may induce a higher level of violence on the part of the attacker.  Psychological trauma24/7…Baaah… 😳
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The only welcoming strip of news is what the Doctor herself said
“Yes, my device may be medieval, but it’s for a medieval deed that has been around for decades,” she told CNN. “I believe something’s got to be done … and this will make some men rethink before they assault a woman.“[…]
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There are a lot of things that make this not work, but it is welcoming that people are addressing the problem, looking for a solution, and thinking out of the box.This may help to sent away the message that women are not always helpless.Women are indeed in sad state of affairs…Razors inside private parts..Teeth arms inside private parts..  **sigh**


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Though not about ‘What women want’,I nominate my post to
Contest by:
Blogadda and Pringoo
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(CNN) — South African Dr. Sonnet Ehlers was on call one night four decades ago when a devastated rape victim walked in. Her eyes were lifeless; she was like a breathing corpse.
“She looked at me and said, ‘If only I had teeth down there,'” recalled Ehlers, who was a 20-year-old medical researcher at the time. “I promised her I’d do something to help people like her one day.”
Forty years later, Rape-aXe was born.
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Ehlers is distributing the female condoms in the various South African cities where the World Cup soccer games are taking place.
The woman inserts the latex condom like a tampon. Jagged rows of teeth-like hooks line its inside and attach on a man’s penis during penetration, Ehlers said.
Once it lodges, only a doctor can remove it — a procedure Ehlers hopes will be done with authorities on standby to make an arrest.
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“It hurts, he cannot pee and walk when it’s on,” she said. “If he tries to remove it, it will clasp even tighter… however, it doesn’t break the skin, and there’s no danger of fluid exposure.”
Ehlers said she sold her house and car to launch the project, and she planned to distribute 30,000 free devices under supervision during the World Cup period.
“I consulted engineers, gynecologists and psychologists to help in the design and make sure it was safe,” she said.After the trial period, they’ll be available for about $2 a piece. She hopes the women will report back to her.
“The ideal situation would be for a woman to wear this when she’s going out on some kind of blind date … or to an area she’s not comfortable with,” she said.
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The mother of two daughters said she visited prisons and talked to convicted rapists to find out whether such a device would have made them rethink their actions.Some said it would have, Ehlers said.
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Critics say the female condom is not a long-term solution and makes women vulnerable to more violence from men trapped by the device.
It hurts, he cannot pee and walk when it’s on. If he tries to remove it, it will clasp even tighter.
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It’s also a form of “enslavement,” said Victoria Kajja, a fellow for the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention in the east African country of Uganda. “The fears surrounding the victim, the act of wearing the condom in anticipation of being assaulted all represent enslavement that no woman should be subjected to.”
Kajja said the device constantly reminds women of their vulnerability.
“It not only presents the victim with a false sense of security, but psychological trauma,” she added. “It also does not help with the psychological problems that manifest after assaults.”
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However, its one advantage is it allows justice to be served, she said.
Various rights organizations that work in South Africa declined to comment, including Human Rights Watch and Care International.
South Africa has one of the highest rape rates in the world, Human Rights Watch says on its website. A 2009 report by the nation’s Medical Research Council found that 28 percent of men surveyed had raped a woman or girl, with one in 20 saying they had raped in the past year, according to Human Rights Watch..
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In most African countries, rape convictions are not common. Affected women don’t get immediate access to medical care, and DNA tests to provide evidence are unaffordable.
Women and girls who experience these violations are denied justice, factors that contribute to the normalization of rape and violence in South African society,” Human Rights Watch says.
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Women take drastic measures to prevent rape in South Africa, Ehlers said, with some wearing extra tight biker shorts and others inserting razor blades wrapped in sponges in their private parts.
Critics have accused her of developing a medieval device to fight rape.
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“Yes, my device may be a medieval, but it’s for a medieval deed that has been around for decades,” she said. “I believe something’s got to be done … and this will make some men rethink before they assault a woman.”

My Favorite Posts ..

Hi all,I just wanted to list out my favorite posts, just in case anybody would find them interesting and useful.Do go through them when you get time and keep sharing your thoughts .

Eazy Cooking!!

  1. Its a Pizza-a stove-top Pizza!!
  2. Tapiki ‘n’ Fish curry-the official food of kerala???
  3. Roll it all the way into your mouth!!
  4. Moringa/Drumstick Fry
  5. Fish Thoran
  6. Quick Vegetable Biryani
  7. “Pizza Dosa” or “Dosa Pizza”??
  8. Date ‘n’ Choco Fudge in 10 minutes
  9. Sprouted Green Gram/Cherupayar Thoran

Womanly-thoughts

  1. “Why do muslim women have to beg for their rights?”
  2. Do feminists ruin families?
  3. Why/why not should women dress modestly/provocatively?
  4. How easy is it to undergo a divorce?
  5. Feminism Tag..but Am I a feminist?
  6. How do we program the baby machine to output baby boys alone?
  7. How important is it for you,to remain faithful in your marriage?
  8. Winning the war-through women..
  9. How do I make his beard catch fire?
  10. Why are women enemies to each other?

Islamic Thoughts

  1. “No time to complain, time to be wise”
  2. “Slay all infidels”..Wow,is Quran so violent???
  3. “How do you, as Muslim, see me and others like me in the light of the teachings of the Qur’an?”
  4. War ethics ‘n’ rules in Islam..
  5. Am I,as a muslim,responsible for the acts of others muslims who interpret Quran wrongly & move around with bombs?
  6. The drama of divorce over phone,email and SMS..
  7. One Quran,but infinite interpretations..WHY?
  8. Living Ramdan,the Islamic way..
  9. “Muhammad was a pedophile..”
  10. Quran asks men to beat their wife!!
  11. Is this what Islamic polygamy is all about?
  12. Muslims hate Jews??????????
  13. Remembering Prophet Muhammad (and his multiple wives) on his birthday
  14. Stoning to death-How and Why is it a part of Islam?
  15. Fatwa Drama-Behind the curtain..
  16. Worship in space!

World Around

  1. Pragmatics between moral police and one’s freedom of expression
  2. Why does Government push Hajj subsidy down the throats of Indian muslims?
  3. Migrant issues – Qatar and Maharashtra,a comparison.
  4. History of Israel-Palestein conflict -as and how lightly my small brain process it.
  5. What went wrong with Pakistan as a nation?
  6. Why isn’t this ‘terrorism’, but just ‘communal-issues’?
  7. The unholy secrets and not-so-divine divinity of the church..
  8. Who decides the fine line between absolute and relative freedom of expression?
  9. What have you done so far,as to wipe out the menace of terrorism?

Random Rants

  1. Disclaimer..
  2. My lovely garden 😉
  3. Holding hands..for a lifetime.
  4. How do I control my anger before it controls me..
  5. Smile Pinki.. bringing smile to thousands of kids with cleft lips..
  6. Tagged – Soft,Melodious and Soulful songs..
  7. Tag-on various bits of my life…

Science

  1. The Weight Of The Human Soul
  2. Will your body decay if you RIP while in outer space?
  3. How much water would it take to extinguish the sun?
  4. “Diamond is forever”…Oh no…Its NOT…
  5. Biting nails;Biting fungus and dirt!
  6. Rate your fear of intimacy
  7. How do blind people dream?

Good day to all..

Get educated as to get abused more!

Now that’s a contradictory statement, isn’t it? I had always been deluded into the notion that domestic violence happens with those women who are less educated, who have low self-esteem and are intimidated to seek help. Sadly, the fact tells it otherwise. Contradicting the notion that domestic violence is primarily a problem afflicting the socially marginalized, it is found that women with higher education are up to 50 percent more likely to fall victim to violence.

 

 

Violence against women is an issue throughout the world. But every community adds its own dimensions to perpetuate the violence. Cultural evils like dowry demands, social evils like alcoholism, patriarchy and its stereotypes add as fuel to make the situation more pathetic. Much has been discussed about domestic violence on various levels of society. Domestic violence being a broad topic, with different issues as causes, dealing with it, consequences and like,I’ld like to focus on correlation between level of education and rate of abuse.

 

 

Talk of domestic violence usually conjures up images of poor, illiterate women, unaware of their rights and economically dependent on their husbands for survival. In a recent study that examined domestic abuse in Egypt, Chile, India, and the Philippines, the evidence shows that domestic violence knows no boundaries of race, class, or geography. What surprised some was that in India, the higher a woman’s education the more likely it is that she will be abused.

 

 

“Kumud Sharma of the Centre for Women’s Development Studies in New Delhi traced the correlation between education and domestic violence to patriarchal attitudes. “Educated women are aware of their rights,” she said. “They are no longer willing to follow commands blindly. When they ask questions, it causes conflicts, which, in turn, leads to violence. In many Indian states, working women are asked to hand over their paycheck to the husband and have no control over their finances. So, if they stop doing so or start asserting their right, there is bound to be friction.”

Domestic violence experts say the problem in India stems from a cultural bias against women who challenge their husband’s right to control their behavior. Women who do this—even by asking for household money or stepping out of the house without their permission–are seen as punishable. This process leads men to believe their notion of masculinity and manhood is reflected to the degree to which they control their wives.”

 

The reasons include neglecting children, going out without telling partner, arguing with partner, refusing to have sex, not preparing food properly or on time and talking with other men!

 

 

Education is hardly the key to fight this menace. Educated women also keep quiet about being physically abused. sometimes it’s for the children, sometimes they make excuses for their husbands and other times they think they brought it on themselves, some just are too embarrassed to talk about it because it deprives them from the little self esteem they have left.  

 

 

Although men’s preoccupation with controlling their wives declines with age–as does the incidence of domestic violence–researchers found that the highest rates of domestic violence were among highly educated men. Thirty-two percent of men with zero years of education and 42 percent men with one-to-five years of education reported domestic violence. Among men with six-to-10 years of education–as well as those with high-school education and higher–this figure increased to 57 percent.

 

 

Around two-third of married women in India were victims of domestic violence .Noting that women with tangible economic assets were less likely to be victims of domestic violence than those who lack them, the report cited Kerala as an example.

“In Kerala, a survey found that 49 per cent women without property reported domestic violence compared with only seven per cent who owned property,”

 

 

The survey says that women in several countries justify wife-beating for one reason or another. Some say the biggest problem is convincing the women that they do not deserve abuse.” Most women who face domestic violence think it’s a normal part of their life, it’s a part of being a wife, daughter or a sister in law,” says Manjima Bhattacharya, who works for Jagori, a group that uses music and theatre to spread awareness about domestic violence.

 

 

The consequences of gender-based violence are devastating, including life-long emotional distress, mental health issues and poor reproductive health. The adverse effects of domestic violence do not end with these or other health consequences for women alone; what makes domestic violence particularly insidious is its intergenerational effects. Children of mothers who have been abused have higher mortality rates, lower immunization rates, and in some countries are more likely to be undernourished than children of mothers who have not experienced domestic violence. There is also consistent evidence for additional disheartening intergenerational effects: Compared with children of mothers who have not been abused, female children of abused mothers are more likely to be abused as adults, and male children of abused mothers are more likely to be abusers as adults.

 

 

Hitting or abusing happens when there is no compassion in the relationship. Men and women need to learn to respect each other, understand that there is a certain way that the other needs to be treated. And perhaps more importantly, men and women need to learn how important self-respect is! Understand that you deserve respect, that you deserve to be treated a certain way, and you will never tolerate abuse. Perhaps then, more cases of abuse will be reported, and in turn, incidences of domestic violence can be curbed.

 

 

Second option would be communication – another solution to a lot of problems. Whatever the apple of discord, there is always a peaceful way of settling things. Talking things through usually clears up a lot of misconceptions and avoids an ugly mess. Unfortunately, in India, we believe in action and not in words… and for all the wrong reasons!

 

 

P.S:

·     I am aware of the fact that there are few bad women out there who misuse their rights, just for instance misuse of anti-dowry law in India. But only because a small percentage gets it wrong, the other majority is not bound to be burdened with the blame.

·     Not only women, men also get victimised.Either way, there isn’t any justification for abusing your spouses. They are not punching bags to vent out your ego frustrations.

 

 

Courtesy

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/south_asia/2946760.stm

http://yle.fi/news/id98725.html

http://www.childinfo.org/attitudes.html

http://www.prb.org/Articles/2004/DomesticViolenceinDevelopingCountriesAnIntergenerationalCrisis.aspx